Marwadi Lugai Ka Vrat

Pappu Rocks

Rilak Singh

Ramayan in Jail

Constable - Sir,
kal raat sabhi kaidiyo ne jail me Ramayan Play
kiya
tha...
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Jailor - Ye to achhi baat he,
isme itne pareshan Q ho rahe ho?
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Constable - Sir Tensn yehe ke,
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Hanuman bana kaidi abhi tak sanjivni lekar wapas nahi aaya!

Pahalwan

Ek Pahalwaan, jo 6 feet Lamba aur strong
tha,
bus me ja rha tha..
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Conductor:"Bhaisahab Ticket
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Pahalwaan:" ham Ticket nahi liya karte..
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Conductor Ghabra gaya, par kuch kar na
saka,
par vo ye baat dil pe le gayaa aur gym join
kar liya..
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Daily wo pahalwaan se puchta aur
pahalwaan bolta ham ticket nhi lete
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Aise 6 months nikal gye...
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Ab conductor bhi pahalwan ki tarah tagda
ho gya...
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Agle Din conductor:" Bhai ticket lele..
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Pahalwaan:" Hum ticket nhi lete..
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Conductor:" chaati dikhate hue "Q nhi leta
bey ??
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Pahalwaan:" Pass banwa rakha hai, isliye
nhi leta.. :D :p

Shakespeare

Shakespeare once said:
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"I'm going to washroom!!"

Tum kya samjhe the?
Oye yaar Shakespeare aam baatein bhi karta tha. Hamesha quotations hi nahi marta tha."

hmmmmmmmm

Ek aisa sentense batao jis mein URDU, HINDI, PUNJABI aur ENGLISH word use huye ho......
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ISHQ DI GALI VICH NO ENTRY.. 

Hindi di punjabi....

Hindi di punjabi....

1. Aur kaise ho aap / hor fudi deya kida

2. Maine aapse kuch nahi kaha / main kehra teri bund maar layi
3. Mai abhi aapko theek karta hoon / mai huney teri bhain di lun dinda

4. Yeh sab kisne kiya / aah kehne bhain chudayi apni ?

5. Main aapko pasand nahi karta / main teri bund ni maar da
6. Aap mai risk laine ki himmat nahi hai / tere tattya ch dum haini !!

7. Aap ne jo krna hai kar laina / tu patt ly jehra lun puttna

8. Uski baat na karo / bund maar ohdi
9. Aap ne moka gawa diya hai / lun farh la hun...

Enjoy!!!

Evolution of man:

Evolution of man:

Shadi se pehle-hero no. 1)
Shad k baad- coolie no. 1

Shadi se pehle: maine pyar kiya
Shadi k baad- ye maine kya kiya?

Shadi se pehle- Janeman mat jao
Shadi k baad- jaan mat khao

Shadi se pehle- tum bin raha na jaye
Shadi k baad- tum ko saha na jae

Shadi se pehle- kuch to bolo
Shadi ke baad- kabhi chup b ho lo

Shadi se pehle- I luv you
Shadi k baad- aaj phir aalu?

Shadi se phle- milne kab aaogi?
Shadi k baad- mayke kab jaogi?

Rishta wohi soch nayi! ;

TENSION

Salesman tension mai tha.. :

Dealer: kya hua ??:

Salesman: mai 6 months se tour pe tha, wife pregnant ho gyi 

 Dealer: beta ab pta chala, bina order k maal aata hai to kaisa lagta hai 

Lottery

Husband- Agar mujhe lottery lagi toh tum kya karogi...?

Wife- Aadhe paise le kar Hamesha ke liye mayke chali jaungi...
Main bhi khush aur aap bhi khush..

Husband- 20 Rs. ki lagi hai... ye le 10 aur nikal...

Maruti

Maruti 800 ki nilami ho rhi thi. Boli lagi ......
15 lakh
20 lakh
40 lakh
Husband: Is khataare Gadi me aisa kya hai?
Seller: Iske 23 accident hue hai, har bar sirf biwi
mari hai.
Husband: iski maa ka.......1crore....

200 Rs ke liye kya Jhikjhik

Ek 18 saal ka Launda Randi Bazaar gaya...
Wahaan wo ooper jaane ke liye seedhiyaan chadh hi raha thha ki ussne dekha ooper se usska Baap neeche aa raha hai...

Launda : Baapu... Too yahaan Randibazar mein kya kar raha hai?
Baapu (Cool) : Ab Beta... Iss umra mein 200 Rupiye bachaane ke liye teri Maa se kya behas karta main...!!!

PAPPU ROCKS

Pappu dialling a phone number,
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A computerized female voice said, .
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Aapke pas iss call k liye balance nahi hai,
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Pappu :"Bas janeman,
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Tumse baat ho jati hai, itna hi kafi hai..

Santa Fail

Santa English k paper me fail ho gaya translation ki wajah se..

1.Main ek aam aadmi hoon.
Ans: I m a mango man.

2.Mujhe English aati hai. ...
Ans: English comes to me.

3.Mera taluq Haripur hazara se hai.
Ans: I belong To GreenPur Thousanda.

4.Sadak par goliyan chal rahi hai.
Ans: tablets Are walking on The road.

Funny Doctor

Dr. to Patient’s friend:"Agar 1 ghanta pehle le
aatey to hum isey bacha lete..
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Friend:"Abe saale,
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aadha ghanta pehle hi to iska accident hua hai
1ghanta pehle kaise le aata..???

Ladkiyon Ka Kameenapan

Ladkiyon Ka Kameenapan,,
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Ek Khubsurat Ladki ne Ghar ka Kuch Saamaan
Apne Gali Ke Ladke Se Mangwaya,,
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Ladka jab Saman Lene Gaya to Rs30 kam Pad gae
To usne Apne Pass se De Diye,,
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Ghar laut Ke Ladka Bola Rs30 kamthe maine De
diye,,
Ladki ye Sunke Boli: "I LOVE YOU"
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Ladka: "Kamini Zyada Chalaki Na Dikha Chal Rs 30 Nikaal

Darr gayi bechari.

A 'GIRLFRIEND' msg d his engineer boyfriend at 3.37 am:" If u r sleeping send me ur Dreams,
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If u r crying send me ur Tears,

If u r laughing send me ur Smiles"
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engineer replied:" FLUID MECHANICS & THERMODYNAMICS
ki books padh raha hun bheju kya"
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No reply from girl.. ;) :P

Darr gayi bechari... :O :P

03 Kaamchor

3 kamchor mil k khana kha rhe the
unko namak kam laga,

1 bola:" jo pehle bole ga wo namak laye ga..
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Sb bethe rahe
na koi bola,

na khaya, 3 din aise hi guzar gaye,
teeno behosh ho gye..

Logo ne murda samajh kar janaza padhaya..

jab pehle waley ko qabar mein utarne lage to woh bola

"oye mai zinda hu" Baki 2no bhi usi waqt bole"

chal putar namak le k aa.." ;) :O :P

Future of frog

Ek mendhak pandit k
pas gaya or apna future
pucha.
Pandit- tuje 1 ladki
milegi
or tera dil le jayegi
Mendhak khushi se - wo
milegi kaha?
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Pandit- BIOLOGY-LAB mai :D :P