Punjab Di English...

A Punjabi woman in london talking in English to a Doctor about her sick child ….

My kaka is ill
ek week da.
Na eat da,
na sleep da ,
bas weep da te cheek da,
nale nak vi leak da…..!!

English da Siyapaaaa !!!

English da Siyapaaaa !!!

In train, a woman slept at Santa's son's place & refused 2 get up.
Santa went to TC & complained:THIS LADY IS NOT GIVING BIRTH TO MY CHILD

Positive

Kudi waley Munde nu: Tusi nonveg khandey ho?
Munda: Haan
Kudi waley: Sharaab?
Munda : Haan
Kudi waley: Drugs?
Munda : Haan
Kudiwaley : Jua?
Munda: Haan
Kudi waley: Sab kuch negative hai, kuch positive bhi hai?
Munda: Haanji, HIV+.

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Punjabi Dieting Plan

Punjabi Dieting Plan
.
7:30am:" 1 bread, half boiled egg
.
10am:" 1 cup green Tea
.
12pm:" half cup boiled chanay
.
1pm:" 1 banana
.
5pm:" 1 Cup Tea without sugar
.
7pm:" 1 cup skim milk
.
9pm:" Green Tea
.
10:00pm:" Johnnie Walker
.
11:45pm:" Chicken Tikka, Butter Naan, Makhni
Paneer, Butter Chicken, Dal Makhni, Chocolate Cake, Gulab Jamun..

Dieting di maaa di

Hindi di punjabi....

Hindi di punjabi....

1. Aur kaise ho aap / hor fudi deya kida

2. Maine aapse kuch nahi kaha / main kehra teri bund maar layi
3. Mai abhi aapko theek karta hoon / mai huney teri bhain di lun dinda

4. Yeh sab kisne kiya / aah kehne bhain chudayi apni ?

5. Main aapko pasand nahi karta / main teri bund ni maar da
6. Aap mai risk laine ki himmat nahi hai / tere tattya ch dum haini !!

7. Aap ne jo krna hai kar laina / tu patt ly jehra lun puttna

8. Uski baat na karo / bund maar ohdi
9. Aap ne moka gawa diya hai / lun farh la hun...

Enjoy!!!

Kutteya di race

Sharma to his wife: Ajj 4 baje kutteyan di race hai, main othey jana hai..

Wife: Tusin vi na bas!! Rehan deo, tureya janda ni, te laggey ae race laun..

Pregnant

Sardar Ji Apni Patni Ke Checkup Ke Liye Doctor Ke Pass Gaya Doctor Ne Checkup Ke Baad Kaha

“Sardarni Pregnant Nahi Hai Eh Gas Di Problem Hai”

Sardar: “Hey Rabba Tu Mainu Lunn Ditta Hai Ya Hawa Bharan Wala Pump“

Punjabi Translate

Punjabi Translation by Santa From Hindi to English after 8 pm :)

Hindi : Mumbai ki sadkon pur goliyan chal rahin hain ..
English : Tablets are walking on the roads of mumbai !
Hindi : Mere mazaak ko hansi mein mut udaao
English : Dont fly my jokes ....
Hindi : Tumne ladki ko kis liye cheda ?
English : Why did you kiss the girl ?
Hindi : Ek ladki chat ke neeche akele khadi hai ..
English : Miss understanding alone !
Jai punjabi

Vyah

Santa - Kal mere vyah teh tu ki payenga...

Banta - Daaru pee ke kalesh

BHAJJI

Harbhajhan Singh becomes the first Deputy Superintendent of Police to slap a criminal 5 years prior committing the crime!
Long live Punjab Police!

Hilter VS Santa

Hitler says,
"There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my
dictionary".
...
...
Sardar says: Ab bolne se kya faayda? "Jub
kharidi thi tab hi check karna tha na"

Newyork ki Capital Punjab

Sardar Son: O God! Please make New York the capital of Punjab .
Sardar: Why are you praying for that?
Sardar Son: Please. Please. Please
Sardar: BUT WHY?
...
Sardar Son: That is what I have written in my exam today.

Punjabi by Nature

Punjabi by Nature

Ek graahak ne hotel ke Punjabi manager se complaint ki: Kitni gandi service hai! Mujhe ek ghante se pani tak nahin mila!!

Punjabi manager ne uske saamne ke waiter ko bulaya aur kaha: Saab ik ghante to kutte vaangu bhonk rahe ne, je tuhada ehi haal reha ta dubara kehra kanjar saade hotel ch guu khan aavega...Paani le ke aaa.... kutieya!!!

Graahak shocked! Punjabi manager rocks!

BOLO tara-ra!!

Q: Daler exam vich fail kiyon hoya?

A: Jado teacher blackboard erase karda si, ta Daler notebook erase kar dinda si,.. . BOLO tara-ra!!

Jo ajj tak kisi di nahi ho saki, oh meri kiven ho sakdi hai ?

Sante ne apni engagement tod diti.

Kiyon ki kudi kavari c.

Santa: Jo ajj tak kisi di nahi ho saki, oh meri kiven ho sakdi hai ?