How to handle females

How to handle females through the ages :
8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68 & 78.....
8 - U take her to bed & tell her a story.
18 - U tell her a story & take her to bed.
28 - U dont hv to tell her a story to take her to bed.
38 - She tells u a story & takes u to bed
48 - U tell her a story to avoid going to bed.
58 - U stay in bed to avoid her story.
68 - If u take her to bed, that will be a story
78 - If u take her to bed.. thats the end of the story..!!